Things Remembered: The TI-82

Before Blackberries, iPods, or smatphones, my generation's in-school electronic entertainment came from the TI-82 graphing calculator. Its killer app was the Programs menu, where you could setup mini-applications to handle, for example, converting Fahrenheit to Celsius or solving the quadratic equation.

Mainly, though, we used it for games. One classmate proved particularly adept at programming, creating "Guess the Number" and "FASTKEY," where you had six seconds to press a key over and over (the record holder maxed out at 82, which remains impressive). Pre-wifi, you could link your TI-82 to another via a cable, allowing for easy swapping of programs. People came back from band competitions with new games, such as Blackjack and Archery. I created a few programs of my own, mostly involving profanities.

Remarkably my calculator and the programs remained intact for more than ten years. It wasn't until this past weekend when a memory failure wiped out my archive. As it was the same weekend that I moved from the city into the suburbs, it was hard not to feel that a larger break from the past was occurring. Having long since lost the linking cable, I have no way of getting those programs back or to download new ones off the Internet.

So I bid adieu to the TI-82 and its bulky, low-tech technology. Because of you, I never really learned pre-calc or understood trigonometry. And for this, I thank you.

Master of business

I now have an MBA.

So now, more than ever, don't fuck with me.

Down for the count

In the years since my love of pro wrestling waned, a disturbing number of pro wrestlers have taken life's ultimate piledriver. The latest is Bad News Brown, who I best remember for his devastating finishing move called "The Ghetto Blaster."

Earlier this year, Jersey's own Bam Bam Bigelow succumbed to natural causes; natural in the sense that cocaine comes from nature. A veritable Who's Who of 80's Wrestling preceded him, from Mr. Perfect to Hercules to Junk Yard Dog to the Big Boss Man to my namesake Andre the Giant (posse still alive and well).

Many more articulate have explained why wrestlers often die before their time. I would only add this: that Bad News Brown, even in death, still scares the crap out of me. Observe:

Pizza, Pipes and Pandemonium

Anyone remember this Groton landmark? All I found online was this memory:

In Groton, CT there used to be Pizza, Pipes and Pandemonium. It survived until the mid-80's or so. I remember going there as a kid. The pizza wasn't that good but the enormous pipe-organ sure was cool. They had it set up so that you could walk around it and see all of the mechanisms moving while it was being played.

Apparently the pizzeria/organ music combo was a nationwide phenomenon. And why not? Moreso, why not now?

Update: There's now a Facebook page where people share their memories, including this (somewhat haunting) photo:

The NFL knows its fans

And that's why Cirque de Soleil opened up the Super Bowl, and why Prince was the halftime entertainment.

That's fan-tastic.

Shiny objects

I find a lot of things interesting. And thus I get easily distracted. Here is what's on my mind--or entertaining it ever so slightly:

• 50 Greatest Commercials of the 80's: all gathered, complete with YouTube files, in one place. Hours of fun, :30 seconds at a time. (update: 50 more)
• FlickrDown lets you download entire photo sets, or a photographer's entire oeuvre, on Flickr. Particularly useful for downloading hot high school reunion pics.
• Ben Folds continues to r-o-c-k in the USA, most recently at a NYC gig that I was able to enjoy. My buddy Bob J. long ago summed up why Ben's music resonates better than I ever could.
• Cover songs - better, faster, more!
• Finally, my nephew knows what he likes:
  
  
  
  I predict great things for him.

The definition of transfix

It's no great proclamation that people will post anything on YouTube. But when you find a video of a professional colleague flawlessly shooting jumpshots on a ramshackle court, well then attention must be paid.

I tell anyone who'll listen

• That your money should be in an online savings account like EmigrantDirect.com. Banks give you 1.22% interest on average, while these online banks give you over 5% and more liquidity than a baby's diaper. I don't know why more people don't do this. Maybe because it all sounds like a spam subject line: MAKE MORE MONEY ONLINE - $$$/MONTH!!!
  
  Footnote: I was parking my money in an ING Direct account, but their rates haven't kept up with the competition. Shop around if you're still using them. If you're a USAA member, their rates beat the competition Abu Gharib-style.
  
  
• That the East Lyme High School Class of 1996 reunion is Friday, November 24th. It will be good times.
  
  
• Reading Leaving Microsoft to Change the World will make you want to stop whatever you're doing and start doing something that matters. Failing that, you'll want to support the good work of Room to Read.
  
  
• Aquafresh Extreme Clean toothpaste makes my mouth an exciting place to be.
  

Watermelon is not art

It is delicious.

Banquet managers of the world, please treat it as such.

The last two weddings we've attended have used watermelons as a fruit platter centerpiece and, criminally, not included wedges for eating.

When marrying in Jersey...

...vendors are going to milk you dry, dairy cow-style. Still, I highly recommend these companies not only for their below-average prices but for their above-average talent and pleasing demeanors:

Milan Photography - if you like the photojournalism approach, he's your man. Milan (his lack of last name adds to his aura) and his assistant took over 2,000 pictures, and he personally designs each album. No cookie cutter templates, and you get to use more than 100 pictures in the final book. He's the best-kept secret of the Jersey wedding business.

Villanovisions Video - Having seen plenty of slow-paced, dimly-lit wedding videos over time, I was anti-video. That is until I saw what Villano did at four of our friends' weddings. He gets the right shots and makes the right edits so that the final video entertains as it breezes by.

Inkspun - for calligraphy on envelopes or place cards, I dare you to find a better deal.

These vendors need no recommendation--all are firmly established as Jersey wedding money-making machines--but if you're going to splurge on something, then consider:

• The Estate at Florentine Gardens - their website does not do the place justice.
  
• White Light - the wedding band that will rock the house from all kinds of angles

But the details are where the magic happens. We probably got more compliments on having beverage plate clips during our cocktail hour than for anything else.

So yes, you're going get milked, but by working with these people, you won't mind all that lactation.